puckandpie | breakfast in bed

It's the second day of Barton's Spring Break and, while I definitely have more than a few projects and papers to keep me busy -- not to mention a couple extra shifts at Semele's to keep up on the special orders -- I also have a few extra hours every day to spend with Jack. And I'm taking full advantage. Jack and the pups have been spending most of their time over in my apartment since Friday night, hanging around while I cook and bake and revel in wasting time and, I have to admit, I'm loving every minute of it. In fact, I woke up this morning with Jack snoring quietly in my ear, Macha pinning my feet down, and Elvis curled against my head and I don't think I've been so happy.

Pulling myself out of that quiet little haven takes some doing, but once I've emptied my bladder, I find the kitchen calling and, thirty minutes later, I've whipped up some french toast, scrambled eggs, and bacon. Finding a bottle of champagne stashed away in my meager little liquor cabinet, I pour two mimosas and carefully carry the bounty back to the bedroom on a tray I'd had the foresight to buy on sale right after Christmas.

"Rise and shine," I call out just as I step into the bedroom, knocking my foot against the doorjamb to try to get Jack's attention.

Of course, it's Shannon and Macha's attentions I mostly get, both of them hopping right off the bed, tails wagging as they bump into my legs. "Hey now, you two wait your turns. If you're good, you might get some bacon but you best go lie down for now."

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My face is warm from Jack's kiss and I let out a quiet hum as he grabs his coffee. I reach across him to grab one of the mimosas for myself, sipping at it as I take the half piece of bacon Jack hands me.

Laughing a little, I shake my head, "I don't think I could say it without turnin' into a tomato," he tell him, happily chewing the bacon. "I bet Shitty would say it no problem though. Goodness, I miss him." It's hardly the first time I've thought as much though I haven't really said it out loud too often. If I'm missing Shitty, I can't even imagine how badly Jack does. "All the Wellies, honestly. Everything here seems so much quieter without them."

I pause with the rim of the coffee mug against my bottom lip when Bittle says Shitty's name, waiting out the roll of anxiety that comes with just how badly I miss him. We don't often talk about all the people we're missing back home, but maybe we should, even with as painful as it is.

"I miss him too," I say after a moment, taking a sip of coffee before setting it on the tray and reaching out to grip Bittle by the back of his neck, thumbing under his ear and dragging him in to press a gentle kiss to his forehead. "Sometimes I wish they were here, you know? But then I realize how selfish that is, and I'm glad they're not."

His hair is so soft when I run my fingers through it, and I pull back just enough to look at him. "I'm glad you're here, though. It's selfish, but I'm really fucking glad."

We've had conversations like this a couple times, though it's been awhile. We don't usually go into how much we miss everyone, but we definitely share the sentiment that, while we'd give anything to be back home again, being here isn't so bad so long as we have each other. Every now and then, I still find myself wondering how much of Jack being her is my fault, like me wishing for it so much brought him here, into this world where he can't live out his dreams.

It's ridiculous, I know. And Jack's never once seemed to indicate any sort of resentment toward me so that's something, at least.

"I'm glad too," I manage, tipping my head back to look up at him. His eyes are warm and soft and I rest my hand on his thigh as I let out a breath. "You know, before you got here, I was pretty miserable. I tried hard not to be, tried to make friends and all that. And I did. People like Derek and Jack and Bay... they helped me get through a lot. But it wasn't quite the same as living in the Haus, of havin' all you hellions constantly underfoot. As noisy as y'all were, sometimes there's nothing I want more than to be back there."

"I know how you feel," I assure him as I put my hand over his on my leg, squeezing his smaller hand with my own. "I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been here when I got here. I don't even want to think about it."

It's actually terrifying, and I feel my chest squeeze tightly as I suck in a breath. Looking over at him, I take piece of bacon and hold it up to his mouth. "Here, eat your protein."

Maybe it's me being selfish again, trying to change the subject, but I don't want to imagine my life without Bits. Not on such a wonderful morning when everything seems so perfect. I just want to be with him, to exist in this moment for as long as we can.

"Oh goodness, neither do I," I replay, laughing a little when he shoves a piece of bacon at my mouth. I don't bite into it quite yet, instead taking it from his hand and relaxing against his arm. As hard as everything had been when I first arrived, I know I can't even imagine how rough it'd been for Jack. I saw it firsthand, after all. And to think of him ending up here with no support at all, no one to sit with him when the anxiety was just too much...

Well. No. No, I just really don't want to think about it.

Letting out a breath then, I take a small bite of the bacon and try for a smile. "Sometimes it kinda feels meant to be, doesn't it?" I ask, tipping my head to look over at him. "I mean, this isn't at all how I ever coulda imagined things bein', but it's just... I don't know. This place isn't always awful and as long as you're around, I feel like it's not too bad at all. You think that's weird?"

breakfast in bed

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